{"id":3554,"date":"2011-10-08T00:42:23","date_gmt":"2011-10-08T00:42:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/?p=3554"},"modified":"2011-10-08T00:42:23","modified_gmt":"2011-10-08T00:42:23","slug":"let%e2%80%99s-take-back-the-word-%e2%80%9cfriend%e2%80%9d","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/2011\/10\/let%e2%80%99s-take-back-the-word-%e2%80%9cfriend%e2%80%9d\/","title":{"rendered":"Let\u2019s take back the word \u201cFriend\u201d!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"Facebook has done an amazing thing \u2013 they now own the word \u201cfriend\u201d!\u00a0 The problem is that they have devalued<\/em> the word while adding value to their brand. Let\u2019s take back the word \u201cfriend\u201d and fill it with value again!<\/p>\n

How many of you use \u201cair quotes\u201d when you say so-and-so is your Facebook \u201cfriend\u201d?\u00a0 That\u2019s exactly my point.\u00a0 The word now, more often than not, just means that you exchanged a keystroke with someone.<\/p>\n

To be clear — I am not saying that connecting through Facebook is a bad thing; I\u2019m saying that few of us actually take the time to connect in the ways that a real friend would<\/em>.\u00a0 We are missing the chance to use social media as a tool that facilitates real relationships and instead using \u201cfriends\u201d as points in a popularity contest.<\/p>\n

So how do we change this?\u00a0 Let\u2019s start with breaking completely out of our online world for a moment and do something really cutting edge: pick up the TELEPHONE and CALL someone.\u00a0 Make someone feel special by connecting voice to voice with them and having a real-time conversation.<\/p>\n

Then take everything you know about face-to-face relationships and bring them back with you online:<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

1.\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 A friend is not just an audience.\u00a0 <\/strong><\/p>\n

Friendship is not a one-way information push; it is a two-way interaction loop. Ask questions, listen to and HEAR the answers, ask more questions.\u00a0 It takes ongoing interaction to get a clear path through the digital noise out there!<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

2.\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 A friend is not just a number. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Think about how many times you hear television ads that end with \u201cto us, you are not just a number, you\u2019re a person\u201d\u00a0 (except for SleepNumber Mattresses, who play with that and say \u201cto us, you\u2019re not just a person, you\u2019re a number!\u201d).\u00a0 The point is to remember that each interaction involves a real person.\u00a0 Yes, I do have over 2800 Facebook friends, but I do pay attention and respond to all comments and postings on my walls and photos.\u00a0 Does it take time?\u00a0 It sure does, but all real relationships take time, so I would expect nothing less!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

3.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 A friend has shared interests.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Friends connect around shared interests, which attract additional friendships that turn into communities of interest.\u00a0 YOU are the hub of your personal social media \u201ccommunity of interest,\u201d so consider it your responsibility to provide content relevant to your friends interests.\u00a0 Hint: if you are authentic in your online and offline \u201cprofiles,\u201d what you are naturally inclined to share will automatically be of interest to your friends.\u00a0 Save yourself some effort and just be genuine from the beginning!<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

4.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Friendships require maintenance.<\/strong><\/p>\n

We are all calling these tools \u201csocial media,\u201d yet we are becoming LESS social! \u00a0Facebook status updates do not count as a relationship.\u00a0 Back and forth conversation ABOUT your status update, however, is a much more social interaction.\u00a0 But don\u2019t let it end there.\u00a0 Take the initiative to reach out and GIVE value rather than expecting everyone to come to you\u2026remember, friendship requires an ongoing flow of giving and receiving.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

5.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Do unto others\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

The way you engage with people makes an impression no matter what tool you are using.\u00a0 Look at your own behaviors and ask yourself, \u201cWould I want to be my friend??\u201d \u00a0Are you noticing and affirming the value of individuals and groups in your network? Are you genuinely interested and paying attention to the people behind the texts and words on a screen?\u00a0 Are you going out of your way to be of service to others in your network?\u00a0 That\u2019s the kind of friend I would want to have and to be.<\/p>\n

A real friend is not just a number and a photo on the screen.\u00a0 Remember that next time you\u2019re on Facebook (or Twitter or Google+ or blogging or ANYtime!) and do what it takes to be a friend.\u00a0 One by one, we can<\/em> take back the word \u201cfriend\u201d!<\/p>\n

\u200e”Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” ~Anais Nin<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ted Rubin
\n<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Note:<\/strong>\u00a0 I will be speaking on this topic (<\/em>Let\u2019s take back the word \u201cFriend<\/em>\u201d) <\/em>with Peter Shankman<\/a> at Social Media World Forum Nov 1st (10:10am)<\/a> .\u00a0 Hope to see you there!<\/p>\n

Originally posted at TedRubin.com<\/em><\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Facebook has done an amazing thing \u2013 they now own the word \u201cfriend\u201d!\u00a0 The problem is that they have devalued the word while adding value to their brand. Let\u2019s take back the word \u201cfriend\u201d and fill it with value again! How many of you use \u201cair quotes\u201d when you say so-and-so is your Facebook \u201cfriend\u201d?\u00a0 … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[137,7],"tags":[1458,393,1476,32,241,480,479,1474,1029,1475,3],"class_list":["post-3554","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-all-posts","category-tedrubin","tag-tedrubin-2","tag-facebook","tag-friend","tag-marketing","tag-relationship-marketing","tag-return-on-relationship","tag-ror","tag-smwf","tag-social-media-marketing","tag-social-media-world-forum","tag-ted-rubin"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3554","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3554"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3554\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3557,"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3554\/revisions\/3557"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3554"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3554"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thesocialcmo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3554"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}